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Entries in School (3)

Monday
Aug312009

Long days, tall orders of coffee.

Tomorrow the school year officially starts. Back to university and all the toils that this implies. Luckily the government grant (for me as a student) just went through and I finally have  some funds on the old  bank account. After the bills are paid this will of course be whittled down to a mere husk of its former cashy glory. But there is at least enough left over for me to be able to enjoy a hot cup of coffee outside the confines of my home, whenever I choose. And I choose to quite often.

I've said goodbye to a few friends this summer. They're moving away to far-off lands and brighter futures and better prospects than this town could possibly offer. I hope to be rejoining them soon. So that we can once again discuss random bullshit on topics of which we know little. while at the same time imbibing in the joys of "life". They'll know what I mean. Hopefully.

Good luck to you all. But mostly to my bromance partner Sven. Who is traveling to The Great White North. A place I myself enjoyed immensely. Tell them Patrik sent you..

 

Tuesday
May202008

Bits and Pieces.

* The reason they're building all these crazy things in Dubai has to be because they can't drink or get their jollies off in some other way. So they build all of these bizarre things. In an attempt to compensate for something. Huge towers and spires and artificial islands and spaceports. But you know what? If it's between going to space and vagina, vagina still wins. Hands down. * What's really messed up about these school shootings is that an alarming amount of them seem to be taking place in the morning. Who the hell has the amount of energy to pull something like this off in the morning? Especially as a teenager. No, murder feels more like an afternoon or evening activity. * Why is it that when someone dies during a race in motorsport they don't wave the checkered flag at half mast? * What if time disappeared and everything happened at once? * If you ever start whispering to someone they're always forced to whisper back. Go ahead and try it. * Just what is a 'walk in shower'? How did people get in before someone invented this apparently amazing new thing? Some elaborate pully system? A poorly constructed ladder? A small tunnel? How about we think through what an expression or word actually tells us before we use them. * I once thought my eyes were open. It turned out I was just asleep under a really bright lamp. * Writing academically about film is like trying to herd cats using nothing but the medium of interpretive dance. * Dogs are the whores of nature. That's just science.
Tuesday
Mar182008

5 People.

This is a list of five types of people I wouldn't mind seeing dead. 5. Condescending Bisexuals Have you ever run into these people? Bisexuals who seem to think that because they find both men and women sexually attractive they somehow, in some mysterious way, are more enlightened then the rest of us. You know, us common folk that only want to fuck one or the other. Truly they are the chosen people! Why? Well because they've seen past gender and appearance and found that you fall in love, not with the gender but with the person. Wow, isn't that inspiring? Granted of course that this non-gender-specific person still conforms to our culture's perception of beauty. I'm sorry but penises, to me, look horrendous. I wouldn't want one anywhere near either my face or ass. In fact, the first time I saw my own I attacked it with a shoe. Sexual preference does not equal moral superiority you smug bastards. Another thing; you don't get more options because you're "playing both sides", so to speak. What it comes down to, in the end, is how attractive the other person finds you. Not just appearance wise although that is unfortunately the most important factor. 4. Young folk who act older than their age This is especially prevalent among university students. People approaching their mid 20s that act as if they were in their late 40s. Wearing boring "adult" clothing, sipping lattes, conversing about what table napkins would be the best for their next couples get-together/dinner party. You'd think they'd be talking about something like "the Geo-political situation in eastern Africa" but no. They have so perfected this act since high school that they've realized that older people don't actually talk about that stuff. More on shallow and stupid people in their 40s later on. What happened to the energy of these people? All I wanted to do when I was in high school was to fuck on the floor and break shit. Thinking about it, that's still all I want to do now. Alright, that may not be entirely true. I do like having a good deep, fervent and energetic conversation about an interesting subject-matter from time to time. But if you actually try this on these yuppie offspring you quickly notice they're incapable of such thought. I suspect they've developed this intricate and boring lifestyle full of little fetishes like napkins, home decorating, couples dinners and other mind numbingly boring activities as a subterfuge for their lack of depth and intelligence. Crafty scoundrels! 3. People who grew up in the 60s and 70s getting tough on kids This is as much an objection to the reasoning as it is to the rhetoric that these people use. I will grant them that kids are insufferable bastards and need to learn some discipline. Hasn't that been true in every generation since the dawn of man though? And shouldn't that be something for the parents to sort out? The schools can only do so much. The main problem with slipping grades in schools all over the western world lies not with the children but with the poor quality of the grownups, the teachers. How to improve that is a different rant entirely but suffice to say that improving the status of the teaching profession and holding them accountable for results may help. What really makes me want to go into a self-induced coma is when these people who grew up in the 60s and 70s use harsh rhetoric and language. Words like grades, expectations, discipline, control and uniforms get thrown around. While they were handed everything in their youth. EVERYTHING! So when these pampered to middle aged, fat, comparatively rich, white motherfuckers come along and say kids these days lack discipline I just want someone to invent cyborg warrior bodies. So that their 80 year old parents can rip their damn heads off! Call it a really really really late term retroactive abortion. 2. Subcultures Stop letting your entire identity be dictated by things other people have created. Be it music, clothing, books, movies or video games. You're being a shallow cunt, stop it. 1. Bloggers and the people who read them Most blogs are about absolutely nothing of worth. They're just some ramblings from some teenage girl (either physically or mentally) about what they did today. And I'm not even talking about exciting stuff like teenage sex and drugs. No, negative, denied. It's always some meandering post about what they ate or what clothes they wore. I have friends who do this, if you're one of them consider this my way of saying; I like you, but for fuck sake! I know these pointless blogs have been an annoyance to many people over the years. I'm certainly not the first to bring this up. I did it however to set up a point. Could we please, please agree to stop reading these "celebrity" bloggers? These wannabe socialite journalists who live these fabulous lives revolving around gossip, fashion, parties and one has to assume rather boring sex. Mostly implied, naturally. They just seem too neat and well scrubbed to be having anything other than dull repetitive sex. In their luxurious penthouse apartments smelling equally as sterile and unnatural as their genitals. It's bad enough that they can't quite seem to string together a complete sentence, they make money doing so. These blogs are essentially the same thing as other personal blogs, only infinitely more sad. For all of us. What sort of vapid, soulless, asinine existence is that? If you're asking yourself how I can rail against this sort of thing and then myself slip in bits and pieces of my own life in this blog, well...you're just going to have to figure that out on your own.